What having a Newborn is like for Me

We look so rested, relaxed, and perfect with a newborn, don't we?

Having a newborn is actually tough.  Seriously.  People told us this and explained especially how hard the first 6 weeks were.  What did I do?  Acted arrogant and like I knew everything.  Yeah, whatever, so you get a little sleep deprived!  Just sleep when the baby sleeps and you deal with it!  Right, parents?

Haha!  Oh, Stacy.

I often tell David how fun things people are doing look on Instagram or Facebook.  I suddenly want to go do all those things or hang out with those people.  Why?  Because like the article, "Stop Instagramming Your Perfect Life", explains, social media portrays a better, more desirable view point on real life.

How does this relate to having a newborn?  It makes me think I am the only one struggling.

Am I the only one who motherhood doesn't come easily?  Am I the only one who is stressed out all day?  How about wanting to throw their pump out the window? Or has no idea when their baby is hungry or simply sticking their tongue out because she is about to puke all over me?

No, I am not.  I let myself believe I am the only one who has no idea what they are doing because I compare myself to what others are doing based on their pictures and how their life appears.

I know they struggle and that they also are stressed out.  You go from 0 to 100 instantly.  There are no days off or even hours off.  It is all the time and that WILL wear you down.  It doesn't matter how much exposure to newborns you have had.  You probably have never taken care of one every day, all day with your hormones out of control.

Now, I love my baby girl.  She is the cutest baby ever.  Yes, I am biased.  I think its cute when she sneezes, sleeps with her hands behind her head, and I even think its pretty cute when she smells.  I am sure the last one will fade :)

So, if you wonder if you are the only one struggling you aren't.  I am.  There is a grace for all that.  There is grace for when I don't want to give Gwen a bottle because when she spits up it makes me stressed.  There is grace for when I don't want to even try breastfeeding because I am afraid I will fail.  There is grace for when my iPhone falls on her.  Don't judge me.  She is fine!

When you see or read about her, know that our life is no where near perfect.  I am doing the best I can, but it won't ever be perfect.

Look at these pictures for instance.

Look how much fun we have taking pictures!  Just kidding.  These pictures came out of trying to cheer me up because shortly before this I was crying about feeling guilty and like I didn't measure up.

Be encouraged that you are doing the best you can and that is all you can do.  It is ok if parenting looks "easier" on other people.  We all know there is nothing easy about it. The good news is having a baby is awesome regardless of the work and mental breakdowns.  Gwen is a blessing and we love her!

I am not complaining and this is not a "cry for help".  I am just letting you other moms know that I have a hard time like you and I only have one kid who is 3 weeks old.  

I will leave you with this picture.  

This is us doing the best we can.  Babies aren't supposed to sleep with extra bedding, but she spits up constantly.  I don't want to have to wash the padding on her Rock 'n Play so I improvised.